Things I never thought I'd say...

Here are a few things that I never thought I would say… and then I became a parent. I'm sure I'm just starting to get to the good stuff that will make the ultimate list that I intend to hand her on her wedding day. But for now here are some I hope make you giggle. What are some on your list?


1. "Don't lick the couch." (See the wet spot next to her face?)

2. Where are your pants?

3. "Don't lick the toilet." (There will be a lot of these but no more pictures because… ew)

4. "What's all over your foot?" 

This needs further explanation. This picture may look like I did a foot print ink pad project, but no. This is what happens when you take the screen out of your window to put in the air conditioner and you store it behind the crib. Apparently my previously immobile baby rolled over and repeatedly kicked it through the bars of the crib. Clearly, mommy needs to wash it. 

5. "Don't lick the vacuum."

6. "Stop her before she licks her spit up off the floor."

The rest are quotes from my husband…

7. "It smells like the Bronx Zoo in here."  That's what happens when you empty the diaper genie and then forget to knot the bag before you close it. It's basically a weeks worth of poop stewing in the room. GROSS.

8. "How do I clean poop out of the carpet?"

9. "It feels warm" This was because she had a poopy diaper that leaked on him.

10. "Don't pull my nipple hair."

Hope this little list made you smile :-) Happy Monday!