Thanks Mom

My mom has always shared stories with me about when I was little. My friends joke that the Hegmann's take out the trash and it's a story. It's something I have always love about my family, we are story tellers. We also love to give each other a hard time. So when my mom told me that she used to give me a dust cloth when I was very little and we would dance to Lionel Ritchie while polishing the living room furniture, I couldn't let it go. I joked that Kathy Lee Gifford doesn't have monopoly on the child labor market. I kid her that even in third world nations the kids get paid at least a nickel an hour, I was doing it for free! I asked for college credit for all my years of manual labor for which I was paid with "experience".

Then I had my daughter and the jokes stopped. I watch my daughter take napkins, towels, socks- anything she can grab, and try to help me clean. I watch the look on her face when I ask her to throw something in the garbage and she can follow through. The self-esteem she gets from contributing to the household and helping Mommy, is astounding. And in those moments I can't help but think, "Thanks Mom".  I never realized that when she told me that I could watch Sesame Street and Mr. Roger's Neighborhood and then the T.V. went off, it was a gift. We danced together. We cleaned together. I learned to take pride in my home. I learned to clean up after myself. I learned that there is great satisfaction in contributing to the family success. And I got to spend time with my mom. I got to know her as a fun person and not just the person who kisses my boo boo's and fixes my dinner (although she did both of those things as well).

The older my daughter gets the more I realize that my mom was mothering me even when I didn't know. Perhaps, especially when I didn't know it. And I am grateful that she had (and has) expectations of me, even at a very young age. Because those expectations never exceeded my capabilities, and often they helped me see my capabilities for what they really are.

I know that someday my daughter, if she's anything like me, will probably make a joke about how I would wait 10 minutes for her to pick up her toys one by one and put them in the toy box when I could have done it myself in less than a minute. She will probably remind me that she and I would clean the bathroom together, each of us with our respective sponges. Maybe she will ask me if I broke any child labor laws by dusting together. And I will laugh, all the while knowing that one day she will see me through different eyes- and think, "Thanks Mom"